Why I Give Back

By Marla Friedman, JFS Delaware volunteer

I grew up in a multi-generational immigrant home. My Bubbe of blessed memory, Rae Karsh, was heartbroken that she wasn’t able to bring her family from the USSR to live with her in Pittsburgh. She sent letters of love and devotion to her mother and half-siblings and any extra cash to help them. When Bubbe’s half-brother, Shmuel, was sent to prison on bogus charges, she sold soup nuts door-to-door (her friend had a factory that made them) to help bribe the authorities to release him.

She felt so lucky to be in America for so many reasons. She left her little village in Ukraine to join her brother in the U.S. (one month before World War 1 began) and avoid marrying an older rabbi! She was able to learn English, choose her own husband, and create a life that brought her joy and 10 grandchildren who adored her. I can’t imagine not giving back to those who are able to immigrate to America as my grandmother did. If not for her courage, I wouldn’t be here.

In the 1990’s I helped acclimate some of our Russian refugees that JFS sponsored here in Delaware. I felt privileged to assist these families and they became a part of our family. Since I was in high school, I have volunteered in rehabilitative settings and school classrooms. I love working with seniors and young children and have taught yoga to these age groups for many decades. JFS gives me the opportunity to share my skills to teach gentle exercise and breathing techniques at the Tuesday Memory Cafe. In this setting, participants improve their physical and emotional health in their daily life.

Volunteering at JFS Delaware has had a positive impact on me and allows me to honor the memory of my Bubbe, a person who benefitted from the support of the Jewish community.

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The work we do with refugees and older adults would not be possible without the support of volunteers and donors like YOU! To volunteer with JFS Delaware, click here. To donate to our Annual Appeal and help us reach our $100,000 goal, click here.

Why I Give Back

By Marti Yates, JFS Delaware volunteer

The plight of refugees became real to me back in 2001. My friend’s brother-in-law perished in the World Trade Center on September 11 of that year. In his memory she created The Welcome to America Project, an effort to aid the refugee resettlement agencies in Phoenix by furnishing the new homes of refugees with household goods collected by the community. I joined her in this effort at a time when the number of people coming to this country from refugee camps seemed massive.

Through WTAP I was fortunate to meet people from all over the world – Afghans, Cubans, Congolese, Burmese, Burundians, Iranians, and Sudanese. My world was enriched and enlightened by hearing their stories about their homelands, my admiration for them increased by knowing how they endured in camps waiting to receive their papers to come to this country, and my affection for them magnified by their profuse gratitude for the meager help we could provide for them. In particular, I was enthralled by the stories the Afghan families told of the tribulations and changes their country underwent from the open freedom and growth of the 70’s to the conflict, deprivations, and trials of the present time. The constant refrain of everyone was gratitude to be able to provide a good education for their children and a life without violence. It was always about providing a better future for their children. Some of those Afghan friends I made 23 years ago remain friends to this day.

When I heard about the need from JFS Delaware for volunteer support with Afghan refugee resettlement in Wilmington, I saw it as another opportunity to help a nationality that I admire. This time, though, it wasn’t just a matter of furnishing their apartment but rather helping them establish their new lives and, to be honest, it has been a challenge. The family I helped was a very young father, a younger wife, and two (soon-to-be three) little children. They needed to learn everything about this country to get ahead: from getting a job, to paying bills, to signing up for phone service and household utilities, to getting drivers’ licenses, enrolling a child in school, applying for asylum, learning to shop in a grocery store, finding medical and dental care- the list goes on and on. In the three years since they arrived, they have shown kindness, initiative, patience, determination, resilience, persistence, warmth, graciousness, gentleness, and hospitality as they work to establish themselves in America.

For my part, I have been privileged to see their development and growth as they work to become Americans while still preserving and sharing the best of their culture. I feel so grateful to be invited to share a meal with them, especially knowing how carefully they must manage their groceries. It’s such a wonderful treat to laugh with them, join in birthday celebrations, witness the children learn,  and go to parent-teacher conferences. It was important to me that they knew, as soon as they arrived, that there was someone who cared about them, that they weren’t anonymous, as they faced the enormous task of assimilation. When their children become adults, I hope they will remember that they weren’t alone when they first arrived on US soil and, hopefully, they will pay the favor forward.

For me, though, I have received so much more than I have given. I already have six children and 12 grandchildren, but now my family has grown to include my Afghan children and grandchildren.

How lucky am I?

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The work we do with refugees would not be possible without the support of volunteers and donors like YOU! To volunteer with JFS Delaware, click here. To donate to our Annual Appeal and help us reach our $100,000 goal, click here.

Jewish Family Services offers maternal mental health care in Delaware

By Janet Teixeira, LCSW

At Cancer Care Connection, we often advise our callers – don’t hesitate to ask for help, don’t try to go it alone when you’re affected by cancer.

This is especially true of internet searches regarding the many forms of cancer. As my team of oncology social workers with Cancer Care Connection would tell you, Internet searches for cancer information can leave you stressed on top of the anxiety that is so common for anyone affected by cancer.

Have you heard people use the phrase “don’t go down that rabbit hole?” That’s our advice to people who mention Internet searches. And if you’re not familiar with that phrase, it refers to digging down deeper and deeper for information online, so much so that you feel like you’ll never come up.

There are lots of reasons to avoid this experience. First, although cancer affects many people, types of cancer are often different for each person. What’s your family history of cancer? Are you affected by other diseases? How early was your cancer detected? Are you experiencing cancer for the first time or are you experiencing a recurrence?

These are distinctions that Internet searches do not make.  Let’s say you have been diagnosed with breast cancer, that it was detected at a very early stage and you have no family history.  So you try an Internet search and get a whole pile of information from fatal to encouraging.

Now let’s say another person is searching for information on breast cancer but she has a family history going back two generations. And unfortunately, her case is considered advanced.

Both people are likely to find the same information, leading that first person to experience anxiety because her low risk factors aren’t taken into consideration.  And this is just one example.

How can you tell if the cancer information you find is legitimate? If there’s a price tag involved? Or if your discovery is a free service? Sites that end in .org normally represent non-profit organizations whose goals are to educate and support people affected by cancer.

By contrast, sites that end in .com, while they can be perfectly legitimate, are usually selling products or services. If you find something that interests you from a .com site, check with your medical team for their thoughts. You’ll want to have this second opinion from someone you know and trust.

So much about cancer can be stressful so we, as oncology social workers, encourage people affected by cancer to reach out for help. Maybe you’re hearing friends and loved ones say “let me know if there’s anything I can do to help…” Take them up on their offer.

When you have a relative or friend sit with you at your computer, s/he can offer perspective. In the example I mentioned earlier that person could point out low risk factors to the first breast cancer patient, potentially serving as a calming force.

We at Cancer Care Connection conduct Internet searches with or for our callers. Our role is to share information, perspectives and stress reducing practices. Visit cancercareconnection.org or call 302.266.8050 for more information.

Janet Teixeira is the Executive Director of Cancer Care Connection, a free telephone service that responds to cancer-related questions and concerns. In addition, Janet is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. Cancer Care Connection is an affiliate of Jewish Family Services of Delaware.

Jenevive Newman, Director of the JFS RISE (Refugee Integration Support Effort), has been named to the Delaware Business Time’s 40 Under 40 List.

DBT’s 40 Under 40 pays tribute to outstanding young professionals who are making a name for themselves through innovative ideas, business excellence, and community involvement. Each year this program recognizes 40 leaders under 40 years old who are bringing Delaware’s business community to new heights.

Check out the DBT’s profile of Jenevive below:

Originally from Ghana in West Africa, Jenevive Newman now passionately supervises a team of 12 employees as the director of RISE, or Refugee Integration and Support Efforts, at the Jewish Family Services of Delaware. She serves vulnerable populations and, in many cases, ensures their safe arrival and transitions.

Together, she says her department serves more than 350 refugee clients every year with over 100 volunteers statewide and a budget of more than $1 million. Last year, Newman’s team served 644 clients from over 18 counties. RISE is currently the largest refugee resettlement program in the First State, helping refugees new to Delaware secure housing, medical services, employment, school enrollment, mental health support and other opportunities. The calls for help, she adds, can come at all hours of the day and night, calls that her team gladly handles to help another in need.

Along with her passionate leadership through RISE, Newman volunteers at her local church in various capacities, including its children’s ministry by teaching Sunday school classes. She also works with her church in her home Ghanaian community, providing a mentorship program for teenagers focusing on teenage girls. The program has successfully helped fund various vocational skills and trades for the young women they serve.

For fun, Newman loves to travel and is currently on her 13th country with hopes of increasing that number in the future as she experiences new adventures. Newman earned a bachelor’s degree in social work from the University of Ghana in 2012, a master of arts in development studies from Erasmus University Rotterdam in 2017 and a master’s degree in social work from Delaware State University in 2021.

Rebecca McAdams, Clinical Supervisor of the JFS Mental Health Fellowship Program, has been named to the Delaware Business Time’s 40 Under 40 List.

DBT’s 40 Under 40 pays tribute to outstanding young professionals who are making a name for themselves through innovative ideas, business excellence, and community involvement. Each year this program recognizes 40 leaders under 40 years old who are bringing Delaware’s business community to new heights.

Check out the DBT’s profile of Becca below:

When Rebecca McAdams isn’t chasing her toddler around with her husband, she is dedicated to improving what she considers to be an intergenerational legacy of community service as her great-grandmother was an entrepreneur who also served her local community.

As the clinical supervisor of fellowship and licensed mental health therapist with Jewish Family Services of Delaware, McAdams regularly mentors rising clinicians and helps increase community access to mental health services through services like the organization’s mobile therapy program. She successfully led state contracts, two state grants and cultivated a culture of learning with her staff, exposing them to more than 10 different clinical training sessions.

To further meet the demands of the Delaware community, which continues to face a lack of health care providers of all varieties, McAdams has also grown her own private practice to include queer affirming treatment and worked with other clinicians to develop a social and networking group in hopes of enhancing mental health resources and support for clinicians across the First State.

McAdams earned a bachelor’s degree in psychology with a focus on children, family and youth from Bloomsburg University in 2015 and a master’s of education degree in counselor education from Pennsylvania State University in 2017. She has trained in several specialties including  trauma, play therapy and attached-based family therapy.

McAdams was a member of the Spring 2024 cohort of Leadership Delaware. Her favorite place in the world is Lums Pond State Park where she spent many summers swimming and frog hunting as a camper. McAdams also has a favorite holiday – Halloween – which is the source of an incredible photograph of her dressed up as Scott Calvin when he was half transformed into Santa Claus.

 

Jewish Family Services of Delaware (JFS Delaware) has been named to The News Journal’s 2024 list of Top Work Places in the state of Delaware.

This is Delaware Online/The News Journal’s 18th year recognizing local companies in the Top Workplaces program.

Companies are separated by size: large companies with 400 or more employees, midsize companies with 100 to 399 employees and small companies with fewer than 100 employees. The process is based on a scientific survey of employees who rate their workplace culture.

Click here to learn more about the award and view the full list of winners.

By Kat Santoro, MS, NCC

Summer tends to be an exciting season for children as there is a certain thrill that comes with the ability to spend time away from school. For some students, summer break is a chance for them to rest and feel more rejuvenated for the start of the upcoming school year. However, for other students, this time of year can feel dreadful as it increases their anxiety for returning to school. There are many different reasons why a child may feel anxious about returning to school. This can interfere with their ability to attend class.

Anxiety can present as a multitude of symptoms that may not always look the same for each child. Some children express more overt signs of anxiety that can be identified by parents or teachers, but other children may have more covert symptoms that are not as easily detected.

For some children, the idea of going back to school can create so much anxiety within them that their body has no place to store it and it manifests as physical symptoms. Some of the common physical symptoms of anxiety can include stomachaches, sweating, increased heart rate, shortness of breath, tensing of the muscles, changes in eating or sleeping habits, headaches, nightmares, shaking, and even fainting.

The psychological symptoms of anxiety can include difficulty concentrating, forgetfulness, anticipating the worst of a situation, irrational fears, constant worrying, and uncontrollable obsessive thoughts. Anxiety can manifest in behavioral symptoms as well. Some children may exhibit signs of social isolation, increased irritability, being so restless that they cannot sit still, and an exaggerated startle response. Since anxiety is not a one size fits all, children can have any combination of these symptoms.

The good news is that there are a multitude of evidence-based treatments available for anxiety. If parents suspect that their child may be exhibiting signs of anxiety, they have options for getting help. Parents can opt to enroll their child in individual therapy where they will get one-on-one care from a provider. There are also groups that allow children with anxiety to come together to learn coping skills in an environment with peers that may be facing a similar situation.

There are also coping skills that parents can teach at home to help their children reduce some of their anxiety. Talking about the anxiety with a trusted person in a safe space can also be beneficial. It is important that children feel they can open up about their anxiety and receive validation so that they feel less alone. Allowing the time and space for children to be vulnerable about the things that are bothering them is a great way for families to connect about the anxiety.

Additionally, research indicates that taking deep, controlled breaths can help to relax the mind and body. Other tactics that can be beneficial for reducing anxiety include exercise, meditation, journaling, and utilizing grounding skills. 5-4-3-2-1 is just one of many grounding skills that families can do together, which can help an anxious child utilize all five of the body’s senses to calm racing thoughts and pull them out of the anxiety through engaging in their surroundings. This grounding skills helps children identify 5 things they can see, 4 things they can touch, 3 things they can hear, 2 things they can smell, and 1 thing they can taste. Families can practice utilizing these coping skills at home so that children are able to easily recall them during anxious moments at school.

Coming back to school from summer break may trigger anxiety in some children and make it difficult for them to feel comfortable engaging in their education. Anxiety can be incredibly overwhelming for not only the child experiencing it, but also for their families. It can be particularly intimidating for those that are unfamiliar with anxiety and how it can manifest. Some families may not even be aware that it is anxiety that has been the culprit behind the various symptoms their child is displaying. Our hope is that as anxiety becomes more frequently discussed it will become easier to identify so that it can be treated.

Jewish Family Services of Delaware (JFS) offers a youth anxiety program specifically dedicated to youth struggling with anxiety. The goal of the youth anxiety program is to help participants identify their triggers and learn coping skills so that they can overcome their anxiety. JFS youth anxiety group programs will resume at about a dozen schools and community centers throughout the state at the start of the new school year. Programs are offered at all grade levels.

JFS also offers individualized therapy for your child. There is a fee for individual therapy, but financial assistance is often available for the uninsured or underinsured.

JFS Delaware’s Promoting Safe and Stable Families (PSSF) program works with at-risk or in crisis families to identify support systems and develop action plans to help them reach their goals with confidence. PSSF can held reduce family stress and crisis, increase networks of support, connect families to services and resources, improve child and adult relationships, and much more. Below is a story about how one family benefitted from using PSSF services.

Amber is a PSSF client in a multi-generational household, a grandfather, daughter, and grandchild who all live with a family friend. For years there has been a lack of medical care, employment, and financial security, compounded by the fact that members of the household have prior or current criminal history. These barriers, along with the condition of the house which makes it difficult to find and maintain proper paperwork, led to Amber spending most of her time trying to keep everything a float to avoid eviction, repossessed cars, or jail time.

On top of all this, the family friend was placed on hospice recently, but important documents and POA were still in his wife’s name, who passed away several years ago. Amber realized the need for a notary to begin transferring certain things over to her so that the friend could continue to live in his home and obtain proper medical care, as well as formulate a plan for the other household members when the friend passed on. There is also a nine year old child living in the home, who has experienced a great deal of trauma, as well as moving from place to place. The mother is working hard to stabilize the household so that the child has a safe and peaceful home to live in.  

The JFS Family Consultant contacted a mobile notary signing agent who agreed to assist the family. Although the costs for a mobile notary are not high, the PSSF family is without a steady income and could not afford the notary services. Since this was a very important step in achieving their goals,  JFS covered the cost of the notary through the PSSF crisis fund.  

So the notary and Family Consultant visited the family at their residence. If the case was straight forward, the notary would have witnessed the signing of the paperwork and gone on her way. However, this was not straightforward and there were years and even decades of paperwork to sort through, some of it incomplete. On several occasions Amber had been given wrong advice, which led to documents that could not be verified or notarized.  

The mobile notary spent two unhurried hours with Amber, her father, and the family friend. She carefully looked over each document and explained the processes to the family, while patiently answering their questions. She was extremely kind and compassionate to their unique situation and the crises they are encountering. The main concern was that the elderly friend would be able to pass away in his own home, and the notary was able to show him paperwork that gave him legal protection to remain in his home.  

The elderly family friend was so grateful to finally get some answers to the state of his property and assets that he had not been able to obtain since his wife passed away. Amber thanked JFS staff members with tears in her eyes, and was also so grateful to finally get some clarity on a very overwhelming situation. It was the first time in possibly years that she was able to get assistance from an agency and not just be brushed off.  

This highlights the importance of JFS to be involved in community outreach. The mobile notary that the Family Consultant used was someone that they had met at a community event in summer of 2022. She ended up being the perfect fit for the family, someone who was able to advocate and advise on a very difficult situation with a great deal of empathy toward our clients, as well as provide mobile services as the elderly client who was not able to leave the home.  

Although much work remains to be done to notarize and finalize the paperwork for this family, they have taken the first important steps in reducing their stressors and assisting their elderly friend. They have already increased their knowledge of resources and network of support. In the coming weeks the client, mobile notary, and Family Consultant will be working together to achieve the proper paperwork and get all documents up to par and notarized so that the family can continue to live in their home and provide end of life care to their friend. 

To learn more about PSSF and the services provided, click here. If you would like to donate to support the work that PSSF does, click here.

Joanne’s brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia when he was about 13, she was around 11. He is now 62. His mental issues have been a lifelong struggle for him and their whole family. He has been in and out of many varieties of hospitals and residential situations.

“There have been dozens of care providers and systems that at times did more damage than good,” said Joanne. “JFS has been the first to provide my brother support in a way that looked at a wholistic picture of his life. From JFS, he has received compassionate, personal care as well as pragmatic care- everything from a talk about his day, to rides to numerous doctors’ appointments and even the grocery store.”

Through JFS Delaware’s Gilbert J. Sloan Care Navigation program, older adults, adults with disabilities, and their loved ones can access compassionate, professional, and personalized care management services to enhance quality of life, encourage independence and healthy lifestyles, and ensure a safe and supportive living environment.

Joanne and her family are celebrating that JFS made it possible for her brother to be moved into an adult family home where he can be among a social group, which he longs for, and hopefully create some sense of “home” and safety. In the past he has often expressed his sadness at feeling like a “throw away” as result of his struggles with mental illness.

“Our parents passed away a number of years ago, and I know that my brother’s wellbeing was top on their list of worries as they aged and became less and less able to care for him,” said Joanne. “I know that with the latest good news that JFS has been able to accomplish on his and my whole family’s behalf they would be “over the moon”, as my father used to say. JFS has shown up consistently and with kind regard in helping to improving his life experience and to help him to know that he is cared for.”

Claudia

Claudia is a 66-year-old woman with some learning and cognitive disabilities. She is married, but lives by herself since her husband has greater medical needs and lives in a skilled nursing facility. Her sister reached out to JFS for support for Claudia with advocacy and transportation needs.

She typically has a care manager go with her to medical appointments to take notes and get clear assessments. She needed rides to other appointments for a short term due to a medical condition that has now been resolved. Her main use of Care Navigation is through direct contact with a care manager.

“When I went into the hospital in November, I didn’t have anybody in the state of Delaware at all to help me,” said Claudia. “The caregiver is really helpful, the manager part of it is really helpful. Taking me to doctor’s appointments… just making sure I have help when I need it.”

Ray

Ray is 96 years old. He and his wife Veronica are in the Care Navigation program. Ray primarily uses Care Navigation’s transportation services since he can no longer see very well and cannot drive.

“My wife and I were in a transition, and we had decided to continue to live at home, where we’ve been for 43 years,” said Ray. “But we needed more help to stay home. And I heard about Jewish Family Services. I called and they said, “we can help you”. And this is how it started. It gave us a better feeling of security. That’s important at our age.”

Ray does not love losing his independence but is connecting with JFS volunteers in meaningful ways as he utilizes Care Navigation services.

The JFS Care Navigation program is named after Gilbert J. Sloan. Dr. Sloan was the President of JFS Delaware from 1984 to 1986 and was a strong supporter of JFS for many years. He was also a beneficiary of the Care Navigation program.

With personalized short-term solutions and long-range care plans, JFS Care Managers improve safety measures, foster independence, and promote a higher quality of life for older adults to age with comfort and dignity.

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In 2023, 100% of Care Navigation clients reported reduced isolation and increased feelings of support, access to community resources, and a sense of safety and independence. 90% of caregivers reported high satisfaction with Care Navigation services, and 95% of clients and caregivers would recommend Care Navigation to a friend or family member. Click here for more information.